Whether it has been five weeks or five years in a relationship, the recovery is never easy. You have invested your time and your heart into this person, and you cannot get it back. We get it, you are devastated. We have been there, trust us, you deserve your moment to grieve.
You struggle getting out of bed in the morning, you feel like there is no meaning left in this world, your phone cannot accept anymore messages because you would rather sulk on the couch than face real life. There is nothing worse than giving your heart to someone who tears it to shreds and then gives it back to you.
Here’s the good news: you will survive. Here’s the reality: the longer it takes you to get over it, the more time you have wasted.
It is time to close that chapter, and move on to the next one. We have seven tips to help you bounce back from a break up:
1. Learn from the relationship
Remember, you broke up for a reason. The more time you spend trying to figure out why it went wrong so you can make it right, the more time you have lost. It takes two to tango so if it wasn’t right then, it is not going to be right now. Instead, take the time to understand the role you played in the relationship, and where you can grow to help your future relationships. At the end of the day, the only person you can control is yourself.
2. Open up the old Rolodex
A good friend is the first thing you need when you are going through a break up. We’re not talking about the friend who is going to tell you everything is going to be ok, or the friend who does not have enough time for you. We are talking the friend who is going to help you face reality and put your big girl pants back on. Sometimes the truth hurts, but the sooner you deal with it, the sooner you move on. You need your person, choose wisely.
3. Invest in yourself
Stop avoiding the person in the mirror. You are strong, you are worthy, and you have a lot to offer. If you have lost that person in this last relationship, it is time to get him or her back. It’s not about who can mark off on every box of your checklist. Hello, using the same checklist will get you the same result. Maybe it’s time to revisit that checklist. You should be your number one priority. This is when you set boundaries and expectations for what you really want in your life.
4. Get Healthy
We get it, with a comfortable relationship comes a little less gym time and a little more pizza. You should instill a healthy diet and exercise for two reasons. One, because you want to live a long and healthy life. And two, you will feel better. There is no better revenge than looking hot after the break up.
5. Find your passion
Often, we lose ourselves in relationships and conform to what we believe the other person wants from us. There is a good chance if you are struggling after this break up that the things you are passionate about are sitting high up on the shelf, covered in a lot of dust. Maybe it is even time to try something new. Now that you have some free time on your hands, why not spend it doing what you love? Your passion is what gives you fire, find the match to light the flame again.
6. Make room for online dating
Whether you are ready to jump right back into the dating scene or you are feeling like you will never be able to date again, online dating is for you. The best part about online dating is that you get to commit only as far as you want to commit. It is important to make yourself vulnerable again, that is where you grow. Online dating is where risk meets reward. Reality is that the biggest risk is having to say, “No thanks” behind the comfort of a computer screen. But, the greatest reward is growing and finding who and what you want.
7. Step outside of your comfort zone
We love the saying, “A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there”. There is a whole world out there that is waiting for you to explore. The only person who will get in the way of where you are and where you want to be is you. Love yourself enough to start challenging your hopes and dreams. And then love yourself enough to go after them.
The beauty about relationships is that some people are meant to come into your life and stay forever, and some people are meant to come into your life to teach you something. The important thing is that you know, and can understand the difference. Implement these seven steps and you will set yourself up to bounce back better than before.
Sarah and Samantha
If you are struggling with a break up or you know someone who is leave a comment below, use the contact us tab, or send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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