Is my past always going to be the best I am ever going get? This question is one I asked myself many times and I know I am not alone. I know I have many sister warriors out there today who are struggling, wondering if your situation will ever turn around. Some of you may have just gone through a breakup, others of you may have broken up months or even years ago and are still having trouble moving on from your last relationship. Neither are easy.
I remember when I was going through my divorce, my self-esteem was at an all-time low. However, I was so numb and fed up with that relationship that I didn’t even realize the crisis my mental state was in. That resulted in a five year self-indulged binge, not caring for anyone but myself, and subconsciously proving to myself that I was never going to get better than I had before. I hurt a lot of people during this time, friends, family and the people I dated. What I couldn’t seem to really understand was that the most important person I was hurting in the process was myself.
I go into great detail in my book Revived: Life after the affair of the vicious cycle of chaos I got myself in after my divorce and the self destruction that led to repeating behaviors that ultimately left me in the same situation time and time again. It was exhausting and the only person I had to blame was myself. I was so focused on controlling my situation, feeling sorry for myself and protecting my heart that I failed to focus on the bigger picture and the promises that lied ahead.
I still remember, to this day, the moment I finally got so sick and tired of feeling sorry for myself that I started focusing my energy on healing, growth, and forgiveness. Something I wish I would have done years ago, but is also exactly why I am passionate about helping women move further faster through this process so it doesn’t have to take years or even a lifetime to understand.
What I know now is that God will never let what you lost be the best you ever had. This I can promise you, just as it is promised to me. What’s important for you to note here is that God waits for you to act first. So don’t wait to feel powerful or confident. Move ahead in your weaknesses, doing the right thing, in spite of your fears and feelings.
So how do you act first? I’m going to give you one simple step that you can start today to begin getting active in moving towards God’s incredible plan for your life.
Start having simple conversations with God.
Let him know you are ready! I know this sounds silly, but I promise you that God loves to hear that you are ready, especially when you don’t have the answers, and you are still ready and willing to trust him and his plan for you. Prayer and conversation with God at first can be intimidating and uncomfortable because you think you need to say the perfect thing, be on your knees in a dark space, or that you have to have your eyes closed. But in fact, it’s quite the opposite. You can talk to God anytime, anyplace, and at any moment.
Most of my conversations with HIM are in my car, cleaning, or even when I am working out. Just doing normal routines, having casual conversations about my frustrations, fears, and deepest desires. Now, have there been times when I have dropped to my knees? Absolutely, but I have found that some of the best wisdom and discernment I have received has been during simple casual conversations with God.
So hear me when I say this, YOUR STORY IS NOT OVER YET. The best is yet to come and take peace in knowing that God will make up for lost time. You just have to be willing to open your heart.