I’ve been hearing the same consistent message lately- Trust God’s Timing. It was loud and clear in the sermon at church this last Sunday, I continue to read it in my daily devotional, and it’s also glaring in my mind every time I have a moment to be alone. Now, for an extremely impatient person (extremely being an understatement), the idea of trusting anyone else’s timing has always been difficult for me. It sounds simple, just trust God- he’s already got the plan in place. But, to be honest even the word Trust makes my stomach churn.
Why? Because being patient and trusting someone else means I have to let go of control- something else I have always struggled with. I love being in control. It is probably my biggest downfall and my biggest challenge but hey, I am human. What I didn’t learn until recently was that the more I try to control a situation, the more control it has over me.
Here I am right in the middle of the oh-so joyous holiday season and my need for control seems to be stretched even farther. Everyone is posting pictures of their perfect homes decorated in flawless Christmas decorations, their children’s matching Christmas jammies, a different holiday party each night of the weekend, and their shopping lists for everyone they care about. You see- all of that for me, causes a lot of anxiety. Two years ago I would have been decking the halls, booking my new-year beach vacation, and pulling out my credit card at every stop to make sure everyone was happy during the holidays, especially myself.
It has been the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life- pursuing something greater than myself.
But a year and a half ago God asked me to give up the biggest thing I needed to have control over. The security of my cushy corporate job, a large paycheck and life-changing year end bonuses. He told me that if I wanted a glimpse of the amazing plan He had in store for my life, I had to take the first step- leave my comfortable job and step into faith in the unknown. What? But I did it, and it has been the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life- pursuing something greater than myself that I cannot see with my own eyes. It comes with many days full of tears and frustration and me still trying to make it all happen in my timing.
One of the greatest blessings in the challenge has been that through practicing patience and trust I have gained a peace I have been missing for a really long time. Now of course my normal intuition still kicks in and my need to control begs for my attention, but this need to control (which I once thought was my greatest strength) I am learning is one of my greatest weaknesses that could hold me back from experiencing God’s plan for my life.
So I wanted to put this topic out there- to my group of Warriors, and work through this together. Not only to help you have peace in any area that you may be struggling giving up control and trusting God’s timing in your own life, but also to work through my own thoughts.
There’s an image that I keep close to my heart that I refer to every time I want to give up, when I think my plan is better, or when I feel like God’s timing is not happening fast enough. It’s a picture of Jesus kneeling in front of a little girl. He is asking her to trust him and give him her small teddy bear and she doesn’t want to give it up because she loves it. What she doesn’t see is the teddy bear Jesus is holding behind his back that is five times the size of the one she has. So simple, yet so powerful, and it reminds me that if I react only to what I can see in the natural, then I will miss out on the giant blessings that God has in store for my life.
For most of my life I have walked around with the small teddy bear mentality.
For most of my life I’ve walked around with the small teddy bear mentality. I call it comfortable. I hate being uncomfortable! (Are you seeing a theme yet?) So of course, I always held on tightly to my teddy bear in fear that if I let go and trust the unknown I would lose my teddy bear for one that wasn’t as nice, or even worse, no teddy bear in return at all.
I’m not going to sugarcoat it… It’s hard to let go and let God. REALLY HARD. I’ve never been more challenged in my life, but this is what I am learning and what inspires me daily- I am a child of God. I am not limited to what I can only see in the natural because I serve a supernatural God. He is all powerful and if I can be patient and trust His timing, I will be amazed and incredibly blessed by the giant teddy bear He has waiting for me.
Is there something you are struggling letting go control of today? Share with me. Let’s do it together.