All you want is to find love, but the dating scene has you questioning if it is really worth it. Dating can be very intimidating, especially a first date. This can lead to uncomfortable conversation and bad decisions. You probably even think about cancelling once or twice before you muster up the courage to walk out the front door.
If you are a habitual dater you may not feel quite as daunted by the thought of another first date, but there is a good chance you don’t put as much effort in anymore because you haven’t had much success so far.
Today, most dates are set up over text, email, or even the swipe of a phone screen; sometimes you don’t even hear the person’s voice until you meet for the first time. One misleading emoji before meet up time can throw you off you’re a-game. This can add a lot of pressure and you are already stepping outside of your comfort zone at the chance you finally meet Mr. Right.
Whether you are back on the market or you’ve been on the dating scene for a while, we want to help you find success. There are a lot of good men out there waiting to be snatched up by their dream woman; it is time to get prepared.
We have seventeen tips to help you take the pressure off and seal the deal for the second date.
1. Don’t try a new look.
A first date is not the time to test out a new hair style or new eyeshadow pallet. You should stick with the look you are most comfortable in, you will feel more confident.
2. Go light on the perfume.
There is such thing as too much. Whether he is sitting across the table from you, or you are nuzzled up at a cozy bar, the last thing you want him to be distracted by is an overdose of orchids in his face.
3. Take your confidence out of the closet.
Put your insecurities away and put your confidence on. You know who you are and what you have to offer. Bring it with you.
4. Limit your expectations.
Leave your checklist at the door. No one is perfect; give him the opportunity to show you why he is perfect for you.
5. Show up on time.
Tardy is not a good look on anyone, especially when you don’t know each other. Arriving when you committed to tells your date that you respect his time.
6. This is not an interview.
A first date doesn’t have to be all about where you went to school, what you do for work, and how many kids you want. Talk about your passions and your dreams.
7. Help take his walls down.
He is just as intimidated by this date as you are; create an environment where he feels free to be himself. Ask questions to learn about his passions and his dreams.
8. Look into his eyes.
You can say a lot without speaking. When he is talking keep eye contact with him, he will know you are really listening.
9. Leave your ex at home.
A first date is no place for conversation about your last relationship. Your only goal should be to move forward, stay engaged in the present.
10. Leave the politics and religion at home.
This is a first date. There will be time later to address subjects that come with a side of strong opinions and assertive views.
11. Go light on the alcohol.
You definitely want to let loose and have a good time, but keep it classy. No one wants to take Sloppy Sally on a second date.
12. If you like burgers, order a burger.
There is no need to order a salad so he doesn’t think you eat too much. He can see what you look like. Men like it when a girl can eat a burger and throw back a beer.
13. Leave your phone on silent.
Personal phone calls and social media status updates can wait. If he is that boring, you should probably just call it a night anyway.
14. Be yourself.
You are perfectly made just the way you are. He is going to find you much more interesting when you are you bring your authentic, genuine self to the table.
15. Laugh when he says something funny.
A woman with a good humor is the key to many men’s hearts. If he’s not funny, don’t give him false hope, but if he is, give him the ego boost.
16. If it feels right, pick up the tab.
Tradition flew out the window a long time ago. If he won you over, pay the bill. He will be incredibly flattered and if he’s your kind of guy he will pick it up next time.
17. Enjoy yourself.
Life is too short to be taken too seriously. Let your hair down, be vulnerable, and have a good time.
Your next first date may not be with Mr. Right, but at the chance it is, you want to be prepared. When you follow the seventeen steps above you will be sure to leave a lasting impression on your date.
You will never walk away with any regrets when you bring your best self to the table.
Sarah and Samantha
photo credit: buzzfeed.com